Alhamdulillah ^-^

Ketika Allah Swt. menciptakan Adam as. yang rencananya akan ditempatkan di muka bumi, para malaikat bertanya kepada Allah Swt. Mampukah manusia menempati bumi itu? Pasalnya, ketika itu bumi masih berputar tidak pada porosnya, bergerak tanpa arah. Terjadilah dialog menarik:
Allah Swt: Aku akan menjadikan gunung.
Ketika gunung jadi, maka bumi menjadi tenang, bergerak pada posisi yang tetap.. Para Malaikat menjadi heran menyaksikan betapa kuatnya gunung yang menjadi pasak bumi.
Malaikat: Adakah yang lebih kuat dari gunung?
Allah Swt..: Ada, yaitu besi.
Malaikat: Adakah yang lebih kuat dari besi?
Allah Swt: Ada, yaitu api.
Malaikat: Adakah yang lebih kuat dari api?
Allah Swt: Ada, yaitu air.
Malaikat: Adakah yang lebih kuat dari air?
Allah Swt: Ada, yaitu angin.
Malaikat: Masih adakah yang lebih kuat dari angin?
Allah Swt: Ada, yaitu doa.

Never, ever underestimate the power of prayer. I did. The result: nearly 4 months of being haunted by perpetually agonizing uncertainty and fear of taking the wrong path for my life.

But then, yesterday, after finally deciding to take 3 minutes of my time to devote myself to a simple istikharah prayer, everything has finally cleared up. I understand now that all of those other options that I had passed up and lamented as being 'lost opportunities' were nothing more than simple tests to see just how much I would still be able to keep my faith in Allah SWT, All Knowing, All Wise and allow Him to guide me to the best path for me to take. I understand that I am and can continue to be good enough to be accepted at universities abroad, but spending a bit more time here by going to a national university is far more important as I'll finally be able to discover for myself just how I can be of use here; knowledge and understanding of such I wouldn't be able to obtain anywhere else, no matter how high the world university ranking. And finally - perhaps most importantly as well - I finally know what major to take ^^

I know there's still a long path ahead of me, and there will be countless thorns and brambles that will try to hinder my way, but at least now I won't have to go through all that with an inner conflict raging within me as well. So, hopefully, now that I'm free of my doubts and despairs, I'll finally be able to put 110% of my focus on setting down my first few baby steps (correction, adult steps) toward this exhilarating if admittedly rather unfamiliar new turn in the road of my life.

On a lighter note,

~HAPPY DANCE~

 for finally being able to know the solution to one of the most dizzying dilemmas I've ever encountered

*hopefully there will be another 'happy dance' worthy post sometime around May/July when I've finally confirmed the passing of my UN and my acceptance at FEB-UGM. Amiin. ^^